It’s a certain blessing to love a person miles away from your home in a very uncommon circumstances, how people are not supposed to be owned, you learn from it. Knowing that you both are full without one another, and yet finding peace in sound of each other’s voices, maybe you will think its quite contradictory and equally blissful at the same time.
Admit how you will come together to celebrate the joy of being together only on one phone call and one text message over the ten time zones apart and internet of your house might not even be co-operating.
We humans have a tendency to paint other’s mind not bothering them to ask the colour they want to be shimmered with but now that you are with a person that you only get to see their face in a device that has already become one of your essentials, you respect the moments you get to live with them, you remember tiniest details you ever get to know about them, the thing is you master the art of communication, you learn to love no matter how deeply rooted the longingness in your bones would be.
It turns out how the half of the times you need them, they won’t be there for you, away from the differences in times and them being so caught up in their work, and it would be a lie if turning your way is what you won’t think it’s best for you and for them. And apart from appearing needy for wanting them you will hold silence closest to yourself than you have ever held them.
But they would still be the one you would be looking for in room full of people, and then realization slowing flowing inside you that they are actually across the oceans, you found home in them, but home is miles away from your heart, and you love them enough to bear the gaps in between your fingers to feel their warmth one more time and knowing it might take you years to finally meet them in person.
This is beautiful knowing love grows deeper everyday, you appreciate beyond the mountains and seas that stands between you two. How they won’t be there for you in your birthdays, your graduation and simply on days you are at your lowest being the most vulnerable you have ever been before and hollowness in your chest would drip out in the form of their names you want to reach out for.
But let it sink in that the idea of being apart is less brutal than being suffocated with the one you claim to share your soul everyday. It’s holding them with every hope even after the very scarce talking over course of week and them telling you how much they love you and you hoping that they are only telling you the truth but nothing else.
You will curse distances and hours that seem to be coming in your way from being with them, you learn that you don’t need them but they just existing out there brings so much happiness you thought you would never get.
Maybe loving a person miles away from your home brings them more closer to your heart. Maybe there’s some good in holding on to someone that’s not there but doesn’t leave you to fight with your demons alone. Maybe you’ll know love at your weakest, at greatest differences and at long distances that tears you everyday but greatest of all gives you strength when you look at them and their eyes, they say, “stay with me, please. “
लेखक : Santosh Lamichhane
मिती : November, 2018
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लेखक : Laxmi Prasad Devkota
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लेखक : Santosh Lamichhane
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